“The more difficult and painful part was to submit to the process of God to refine and mold me into the kind of person He wanted me to be.  Everyone who has been fruitful for the kingdom of God has gone thought this process.  It usually takes years.  The good news is that you don’t need to be some kind of spiritual giant to serve God.  If that were true, very little would ever get done!  It’s about whether or not you are available to be broken, to die to self, and to be put back together by God.”

So here is a portion of Ann Voskamp’s book “1,000 Gifts” . . . ( I wish I could buy and give out her books to everyone I meet . . . )

“Why?”  My mother-anger could crack vases.  He’s smirking.

“Why,would you throw that at him?”  I’m too shrill, too gaped, too blind-white angry . . .  I’m mad.  I’d like to will myself out of it but the blood is pounding loud in my ears and the sons clash at each other with dagger eyes. Why?  Can I just go back to the moon and brazen glory?  Wind and trees and sky wake me and I’m Peter on the mountaintop, stirring to see The Glory in all it’s God-radiance, stammering  out that it’s good to be here; let’s build shelters and never depart (Luke 9:28-36).  But there’s always the descent from the mount.  The meeting of the crowd, the complaining, the cursing.  Obvious and immediate transfigurations, faces that once changed appearances.  We betray Who we know.  Didn’t Peter?

. . .A boy drives a plate hard back down the table at his brother.  And God tries to gently drive the words of Cuassade from the knowing of my head to the bleeding of the heart:

‘You would be very ashamed if you knew what the experiences you call setbacks, upheavals, pointless disturbances, and the tedious annoyances really are.  You would realize that your complaints about them are nothing more or less than blasphemies – though that never occurs to you.  Nothing happens to you except by the will of God and yet (God’s) beloved children curse it because they do not know it for what it is.’

A blasphemer.

I pull out a chair from the table, sink down.  The sunflower heads have turned low.  The Tall-Son is chewing toast too loud at the other end of the table.  What compels me to name these moments upheavals and annoyances instead of grace and gift?  Why deprive myself of joy’s oxygen?  The swiftness and starkness of the answer startle. Because you believe in the power of the pit.  Really?  I lay my head on the table.  Do I really smother my own joy because I believe that anger achieves more than love?  That Satan’s way is more powerful, more practical, more fulfilling in my daily life than Jesus’ way?  . . .

Faith – Love – Hope

- Some of the greatest things in life, aren’t they?  I mean when you think of it, what do you value most in life?

Okay, so these are just notes of what I shared in a devotional at our ladies sewing circle . . . but they are also  something God just put on my heart.

We always thank God for all of you and mention you when we pray.  We continually recall before God our Father

–       The things you have done because of your faith.

–       The work you have done because of your love

–       That you continue to be strong because of your hope. (New Century Version)

FAITH -being sure of the things we hope for, and knowing that something is real even if we do not see it (believing).  Faith is the reason we remember great people in the past . . .

Abel died but through his faith he is still speaking . . . When we are gone will our faith still speak or will our weakness obliterate into silence? . . .

By faith Noah, heard God’s warnings about things he could not yet see . . . He lived out his faith . . . He listened and acted on them because He had faith – He believed.

By faith, Abraham obeyed God’s call to go to another place . . . not knowing the outcome.

Though faith, Sarah, received strength to conceive seed and deliver a child.

Faith – seeing faith lived out is about as inspiring as it gets.  Examples before our eyes, in our lifetime, in people we know and admire . . . Now sure how or where or when, but believing God . . . Some can be quite personal in our lives, our marriages, our relationships, and they may be hidden, but one day will be revealed.  Seeing faith lived out is so encouraging!!!

Hebrews 11:13 . . . they died in faith, NOT having received the promises, but having seem them afar off.

Without faith it is impossible to please God, he that comes to God MUST believe that He is and that He is a rewarder of those who diligently seek Him.

Say my daughter Violet was hungry and tired, but instead of gazing at my face and outstretching her arms and hands upward to me expecting me to feed her and care for her, she would just sit there listless, and lethargic with dull, sad, empty eyes . . . no faith whatsoever in that I would take care of her . . . With faith, believe me, YOUR EYES ARE GONNA SHINE!

I Peter 1:7 These troubles come to prove that your faith is pure.  This purity of faith is worth more than gold. The purity of your faith will bring you praise and glory and honor when Jesus Christ is shown to you.

In heaven it will be revealed ( maybe hidden to others here) all those times you’ve held out your arms to God, and cried expecting . . .

8        You have not seen Christ, but you still love Him.  You cannot see Him now, but you believe in Him.  So you are filled with a JOY THAT CANNOT BE EXPLAINED, A JOY FULL OF GLORY!  . . . and you are receiving the goal of your faith – the salvation of your soul.

With faith our eyes are gonna shine . . . because God IS (real)!

Is anything more important or noteworthy than Jesus (God) reaching down to those with outstretched arms, tears coursing down their cheeks, expecting in faith? . . . Is anything more PRECIOUS than Jesus reaching down and picking you up??? . . .

LOVE – the work you have done because of your love.

Taking care of your families, praying, teaching, cooking, cleaning, supervising, organizing,  . . . being patient, kind, cheerful – even when it’s difficult and you might be “dogpaddling in the Sea of Overwhelm.”

All these things need love or they are just a clanging symbol . . .  I see each one of you loving your families and doing your best . . . not deserting or giving up, but bravely holding up your end and giving it all you’ve got!

God\Jesus is like a mother (We mothers are made in His image)  God takes care of us daily, leading , guiding, planning, being patient with our wanderings and weaknesses and loving us through it all . . .

HOPE – to want and expect or  DESIRE AND BELIEVE ) ( Col 1:21-23) One time you were separated from God – You were his enemies in your minds. . .   God made you friends again.   . . . IF you continue strong and sure in your FATIH, and not be moved away from HOPE.

Hope is soooo essential – to desire, believe or expect!  Hope and faith are a lot alike  . . . If you have hope, your eyes are gonna shine also!

Romans 8:4 who against hope believed in hope . . .

8:24 we are saved by hope

Heb. 6:19 hope as an anchor

Psalm 42:5b “I shall put my hope in God and KEEP praising Him. (arms upraised)

I Peter 1:3 Lively hope by Christ’s resurrection

I John 3:3 Hope purifies . . .

Romans 5:5” And hope will never disappoint us, because God has poured out His love to fill our hearts.”  Hmmmm, how can that be? . . . you desire and believe and your hope will never be disappointed?  How does that work? . . . I tried to reconcile this with a relationship in my life that has been so disappointing . . . It’s in those times where my arms have fallen down a bit, but God’s telling me “KEEP THOSE ARMS UP!”  I need you to believe . . . to ask . . . to hope . . . Yes, maybe that relationship or person will not change for the better, but you will not be disappointed because I will pour my love into your heart and THAT NEVER DISSAPOINTS!!!

I Cor. 3:12 “We have this hope so we are very bold.”

We hope for the blessings God has for His children.   These blessings which cannot be destroyed or spoiled or lose their beauty are kept in heaven for you.

Psalm 42:11 Hope thou in God, for we shall yet praise Him!

71:5 Hope in God and forget not his works

130:5 We wait and hope . . . “I wait for the Lord, my soul doth wait, and in His word do I hope.”

130:7 Hope in the Lord for with the Lord there is mercy and with him  is plenteous redemption.

Prov. 10:28 Hope of the righteous  shall be gladness

13:12 Hope fulfilled is a tree of life –

19:18  (Chasten thy son)  Do something while there is hope (don’t wait until it is too late – speak to a friend)

Psalm 16:9 – “I have set the Lord always before me;  because He is at my right hand, I shall not be moved.  Therefore my heart is glad and my glory rejoiceth.  My flesh also shall Rest in hope.”

Psalm 31:24 “Be of good cheer and He shall strengthen your heart, all ye that hope in the Lord.”

Romans 8:25 But if we hope for that we see not, then do we with patience wait for it.

12:12 Rejoicing in hope . . .

15:13 Now may the God of hope fill you – with all joy and peace – in believing, that ye may ABOUND in HOPE by the power of the Holy Spirit.

I Thes 2:19 What is our hope or joy or crown of rejoicing? . . . Is is not in bringing in family and friends before Christ’s coming? . . .

II Thes 2:16 May our Lord Jesus Christ himself and God our Father encourage you and strengthen you in every good thing you do and say.  God loved us and through his grace He gave us a good hope and encouragement that continues forever.

Titus 3:7 Blessed hope (desire and expectation) and glorious appearing – God coming for us

Heberews 3:6 If we hold fast the confidence and the rejoicing of the hope firm till the end. – We are Christs.

With faith, our eyes are gonna shine, with love our efforts will not return unto us void and with hope we can rest in His promises, and be a shining light for our God!

God is amazing . . . He is so creative and original.  Even before I was born He had my life all mapped out.  It’s so interesting to look back and see how God has led . . . Especially how He led Japheth and I together . . . I’m sure He was smilin’ big when He took me to MN . . . and I was smilin’ big when I left!

It’s still interesting to see how God guides us now . . . though it seems a bit hazier at times . . . I know He’s still workin’ in the background where I can’t see . . . It’s still all mapped out . . . He’s still so trustworthy!

The problem is that now the thing in question isn’t so clear . . .  It’s not unanimous.  Family opinions differ. Relationships strain . . . The heart is burdened wanting so much to make the right choice . . . The years go by . . .

God is in control . . . He sees the complete canvas . . . and of course finished front view.  I . . . I am limited in my sight.  So . . . I choose to trust . . . to wait . . . to pray . . . to rejoice . . . to joy in each day . . . to give thanks . . .

For His way is perfect . . . and this is part of the perfect.

Though I don’t see or understand . . . that I just hold tight to His hand and trust.

Been reading Amy Carmichael’s “IF” . . . if you wondered.

Jaden turns four today!

Stayed home with FIVE sick children Sunday . . . not really my idea of a special Easter . . . but did have a special time “Alone” (as a mother can be)  with the Lord . . . God is good . . . He is faithful . . . He is powerful . . . He’s not dead, but more alive than you or I can ever be!

Finally got the stroller out of the garage.  It was a job just getting it out!!!

The boys had some help last week on their little log cabin in the woods.  They love working out there cuttin’ logs and such though they have been banned from having a fire out there for awhile due to not taking proper precautions against forest fires.

Japheth and Jeremiah are the younger boys on this pic.  Neighbors are wonderful people . . . at least if you have the kind we do!!!

Read this this morning and just wanted to share it with you too . . . Thought it was interesting what she said about a self-disciplined adult and a parent-disciplined child . . . Are we laying the groundwork  for that?  Just a challenge for me . . .  number one I think would be the hardest for me (will think about this.)  And number 15 I don’t agree with.  I believe in  teaching them to work at a young age.  It’s good for them to be given “commands” and have them do them.  Part of learning to obey . . .

Susanna Wesley’s 16 Rules of Parenthood

Susannah Wesley was the 25th child of twenty-five, and the mother of nineteen children,

including John and Charles Wesley. Through much adversity, she dedicated her

life to instilling a sense of Christian Destiny into each of her children. Her children went

on to change the world.

Here are 16 rules she laid down in her home.

1. Eating between meals not allowed.

2. As children they are to be in bed by 8 p.m.

3. They are required to take medicine without complaining.

4. Subdue self-will in a child, and those working together with God to save the child’s soul.

5. To teach a child to pray as soon as he can speak.

6. Require all to be still during Family Worship.

7. Give them nothing that they cry for, and only that when asked for politely.

8. To prevent lying, punish no fault which is first confessed and repented of.

9. Never allow a sinful act to go unpunished.

10. Never punish a child twice for a single offense.

11. Comment and reward good behavior.

12. Any attempt to please, even if poorly performed, should be commended.

13. Preserve property rights, even in smallest matters.

14. Strictly observe all promises.

15. Require no daughter to work before she can read well.

16. Teach children to fear the rod.

On Discipline

Susannah Wesley believed that for a child to grow into a self-disciplined adult, he/she must first be a

parent-disciplined child. To her, the stubborn flesh was the hardest battle for Christians to fight, and godly

parents would do well to equip their children to overcome it early. She writes:

“When the will of a child is totally subdued, and it is brought to revere and stand in awe of the parents,

then a great many childish follies … may be passed by. . . . I insist on the conquering of the will of children

betimes, because this is the only strong and rational foundation of a religious

education … when this is thoroughly done, then a child is capable of being

governed by reason and piety.”

One day one of her daughters wished to do something which was not

altogether bad, but which was not right. When she was told not to do it, she

was not convinced.

It was late and she and her mother were sitting beside a dead fire. Her

mother said to her: “Pick up that bit of coal.” “I don’t want to,” said the girl. “Go

on,” said her mother. “The fire is out, it won’t burn you.” “I know that,” said the

girl. “I know it won’t burn me but it will blacken my hands.” “Exactly,” said

Susannah Wesley. “That thing which you wish to do won’t burn, but it will blacken.

Leave it alone.”

So what does all this pertain to in my life today?  This morning I was reading in Exodus 17  where the Israelites are going to battle against the Amalekites, and Moses says to Joshua, “Tomorrow, I will stand on the top of the hill with the rod of God in my hand.” And so it happens that when Moses held up his hand, Israel  prevailed,  and when he let it down their enemies prevailed.

In my life at the dawn of each  new day I purpose to stand at the top of the hill with he rod of God in my hand . . . and as long as I do, victory is attainable . . . but my hands, like Moses, become heavy . . . And yes, there is support.  There is a stone to sit on and helpers are holding up my arms . . .

. . . But sometimes I just get weary of all that it takes to keep going.  Why did God allow it to be this way? . . . Why can’t I have enough strength to stand and to keep my own arms up?  No one else could do Moses’ job.  No one else can really fill my roll as wife and mother to my husband and little Staufferites . . .

” . . . and his hands were steady till the going down of the sun.”  Moses held on and fought even though he was tired to the bone.  Till the day was done and the battle won, he keep “fighting” . . .

Eph.6:12 For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against principalites, against powers, against the rulers of darkness of this age, against spiritual host of wickedness in the heavenly places.  Therefore take up the whole armor of God that ye may be able to withstand i the evil day and having done all to stand . . .

Ep. 6:16  says, “Above all, taking the shield of faith . . .

There’s too much at stake here . . . souls making choices that will affect their eternal destiny . . . I can not, I will not give in to weariness in the battle. . . I will not be lulled to sleep when there is a battle being fought and God is depending on my to do my part that no one else can do.

He’s given me little ones not to just fill my life with the happiness that children bring but to train for war against the evil one, to share with them Life Divine and the ways Satan tries to lull us to sleep or kill us, disquiet our peace, and make us anxious and fretful, make us a stumbling block to others or lax and undisciplined in things that matter most like keeping God number one and seeking His wisdom in EVERY thing, following His path straight and narrow path when it’s hard and rough . . . believing that God does see the Big Picture and trusting Him when I can’t make sense of my little, itsy, bitsy piece of it . . .

Genesis 15:1  “Do not be afraid, Abram Aimee, I am your shield, your exceedingly great reward.” When I was engaged I couldn’t wait to live life with my Fiance(Husband) that’s almost all I thought about.  God says that He is our exceedingly great reward . . . To spend the rest of our lives with Jesus . . . Yes, that will be the greatest reward I could ever want.  Exceedingly great!!!

How can I NOT hold on till the day is done and the battle’s won? . . . Hold on!

“When the people of the land come before the Lord at the appointed feasts, whoever enters by the north gate to worship is to go out the south gate; and whoever enters by the south gate is to go out the north gate. No one is to return through the gate by which he entered, but each is to go out the opposite gate.” Ezekiel 46:9 (NIV)

We are to go out and come back a DIFFERENT mom . . .   Love it!

Just needing to hear this myself, when I look at my house these days . .  

Doubt sees the obstacles; faith sees the way.

Doubt sees the darkest night; faith sees the day.

Doubt dreads to take a step; faith soars on high.

Doubt questions, “Who believes?”

Faith answers, “I.”